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Thursday, May 30, 2019

Train Them Up; PT&A's New Project--A Brand Story

When I was 22 years old  I sought God for my purpose. Meeting Dr. Myles Monroe in the lobby of Metropolitan Christian Worship Center and having him tell me. “Connect with God the manufacture and find out why He sent you here to Earth and you will never founder.” It changed my life. I have always worked with children it started in the church nursery when I was 13. So, after graduating from college and working at Kiwanis Camp Wyman where I learned first-hand the devastation f children who were wards of the state. I met two little girls ages 10 and 12 whose mothers put them into care rather than give up the boyfriends who were molesting their daughters. It was the first time I met with children who were not in connected relationships with their parents.  It broke my heart and sent me to God not just to find why, but how I could become the solution. This started me on the journey to understanding how broken adults in turn break their kids. It was a few years late that I realized 100% of adults are broken and need help to heal so they can effectively connect with their children
In 1995 I graduated from Oral Roberts University with a master’s degree in early childhood education with an emphasis in parenting. It was ll years later when I along with three friends formulated Parents, Teachers, and Advocates a parent development group whose mission is to coach adults to inspire, motivate and empower their children to become exceptional adults. Since then we have worked with over 10,000 adults in conjunction with nonprofits, churches, childcare centers and others coaching parents to overcome their brokenness and begin to build stronger relationships with their children.
Train Them Up is our new project. This show is designed to create a safe place where adults can be authentic sharing joys, hurts, frustrations, and anger with God, each other, and experts. It is the goal that through this authenticity we will develop strong connections with ourselves, God, our community, and our children. Allowing us to use the authenticity and connectedness to become more effective parents. I often say parenting is the toughest job you will ever love and hate. Train Them Up is a talk show dedicated to coaching parents into Authentic, Connected, and Effective parenting from pre-birth through college graduation. Come and join our community watch the show, join our FB page, join our 30, 60, and 90-day challenges, attend our conferences, and travel with us on our cruises. You can be an effective parent you just need authenticity and connection to bring your child from birth through college graduation.

Believe in Parenting

Want more information ptanda.org 

Book by Barb Harvey--
Work-Life Balance 
Multiple Intelligence: Building You and Your Team Choosing High-quality Child Care

Wednesday, May 15, 2019

Are You Ready for the Summer?

Here in Georgia we have two weeks of school left and parents are working on plans for their children going into Summer. Some kids will go see family for the Summer holiday. Some kids will go off to a long camping session. Some will sit at home and play, games, watch TV, and just crash. Still others will spend half the tinme in Summer School and then move on to other activities. Summer is not like it was for me when I was off in the late 70's and early 80's where I left home on my bike came home for lunch, left and did not get back until dinner. I then was gone again until dark. "Be hme before the street lights come on" was the the rule in our house. Now, kids do not have that much freedom so it falls to parents to help kids create great Summer vacays.

So here's where I suggest you start. Have you children take a multiple intelligence inventory there is a wonderful one by Scholastic here is the link to it. (By the way Scholastic has some great learning tools, I suggest you go online and do a parent registration!) Multiple intelligence is the use of what causes the brain to rev up and become activated in a way that exudes positive energy and allows people to thrive. I like to call it brain sparking.

I firmly believe that understanding your multiple intelligence allowed you to find out not only what you're good at doing and what excites your learning and life enjoyment. Having your children participate in activities, camps, and programs that allow them to feel the power of their brain at full engaement not only makes them happy.  It  gives them the tools needed to make their brains work better, faster, and more efficiently.

This Summer it is possible to give your children a lifelong gift. The gift of knowing what causes their brain to engage on all cylinders and thus enable them to think more clearly in both school and life. Understanding thier multiple intelligence is something they can carry forward into their future and be all the better for it.

Here are my thoughts for great ideas for multiple intelligences activities.

Logical/Mathematical-Space /Robotics/Coding 
Linguistic-Blogger/Spoken Word/Magazine Creation
Musical Band/Composition-music/Songwriting-lyrics
Bodily/Kinthestetic Soccer/Gynastiscs/Swimming
Interpersonal Cooperative porjects/Lego Bulding/Debate
Intrapaersonal Knitting/Cooking/Crochet
Existejtial Problem-Solving/Mystery/Religion

Believe in Parenting

Want more information on Parenting? ptanda.org

Want more information on Multiple Intelligences check out my paper on it here: Multiple Intelligences: Build You and Your Team

Tuesday, May 14, 2019

Same Stage, Different Age!

In childhood there are two stages that are similar yet different in the way they need to be handled. The ages are those of two year olds and those of teenagers.  These two ages have very different abilities in self-care, yet share a common goal: Independence.

I can do it myself.  Many parents will remember this statement coming from the two year old who wanted to put on their own shoes. During the teen years it shows up by wanting to do more adult like behaviors.  It is important to recognize that wanting to do something versus being at a developmentally appropriate level to do it are two different things.  Teens especially young teens need to earn the privilege to do more adult-like activities. A child who can not take out the trash and clean-u up their room without nagging is not ready to spend unsupervised time with their friends.

Supervision, Supervision Parental supervision is the most important job when discussing a two year old, quiet in the house means trouble.  Most parents think that teens need less supervision. They need more. Teens are looking into the adult world with all the curiosity of a two year old.  They are looking into drinking, driving, smoking, sex, and other adult activities. These children are not more able to accept this responsibility that the two year old is ready to tie their own shoes. Parents do need to know who their teen’s friends are, who their parents are, where they are going and what they are doing.

Undivided Attention Children at both stages need time with their parents. Two year olds need this time to be held, read to, and reassured. Teens need this time to be mentored, comforted, and supported.  Parents who practice active listening really ensure teens have what they need. Active listening requires listening and not judging. Asking your teen,”Are you seeking advice or do you just need me to listen?” This question sets the stage for how you will listen. Teens also sometimes talk more in the midst of an activity. Go for cooking dinner, playing a board or card game, hiking, or walking.

Although, the age changes the temperament and personality do not change. Keep this in mind as you spend time with your teens. Treat them accordingly and you and your teen will come through the teen years with flying colors.

Believe in Parenting

Want more information? ptanda.org

Wednesday, May 1, 2019

You look out for the welfarae of your children! Are You Willing to Look out for oOther Children too?

Monday morning I was speaking to the Trainer of Volunteers for Fulton County CASA. She stated to me the serious nature of lack of support for her agency. There are approximately 13,000 children in custody in the state of Georgia; 1300 of them are in Fulton County. This means ten perscent of all the children in Georgia who need someone looking out for their best interest are her in Metro Atlanta. Currently, there are approximately 850 children who do not have a CASA volunteer looking out for their best interest.


I am attaching the link to the Fulon County CASA website here. Though there is a donate button and CASA is always glad to have your monetary donations. What the children of Fulton County need is for someone to be trained in how to help them and ensuare their best ibnterests are being emphasised before the court. They need an independant and well trined adult to speak for them in court.

There is a 40-hour training to be a volunteer. They are through in how they train people to serve the children in this capacity. This crisis can only be solved by adults who are willing to at least committ their time to be trained. Having gone through the training a person could then decide whether or not they would have the time and inclination to help. Please consider at the very least  going through the training.

Believe in Training

Monday, April 22, 2019

Brining Using Multiple Intelligence in Children’s Ministry Classrooms

Parents, Teachers and Advocates has seen and need over the last few years a need for churches to begin using educational strategies to help children grow and develop in children's ministry. We know that there are churches of less than a thousand members who cannot afford to bring in a speaker to train their children Ministry volunteers. So, we are partnering with Rabbi Kevin Solomon and Congregation Beth Hallel to bring this class to any smaller Church in the Atlanta area who would like to have their volunteers trained. The class entails the following:

Using Learning Styles in the Children’s Ministry Classroom
  • Learning Style Defined- Ice breaker students will begin the class by learning the basics of what learning styles are.
(15/20 minutes)

  • Definition of Multiple Intelligence In a mini-lecture students will learn about the eight forms of intelligences defined by Dr. Howard Gardner. (15/25 min)

  • Using Multiple Intelligence using a hand-on exercise studwents will discuss the eight forms of intelligence and how they have seen them used in their lives. (35/50 min)

  • Basics of Classroom Use students will discuss and develop ways for them to use learning styles in practical and ongoing manner. (35/50 min)

  • Using Curriculum to Plan Basic Use Each ministry uses a different curriculum. Looking at the format specific to the ministry. Students will use a lesson plan to create a multiple learning environment. (20/30 min)

  • Practice Classroom Environment and Use of Learning Styles Using the created plan students will then set up, create open ended questions and present to other classmate their plan for a multiple learning style classroom. (Only 4 hr. 1.5 hrs)

Monday, March 25, 2019

Quality infant care and what it looks like

In the early childhood srena infant care is the most expensive and most intricate of all tiled care. The main reason for this is that infants need individualized direct care.  there for there are fewer teacher to Children the ideal ratio in one teacher to for children. This ratio makes it possible for the teacher to not just feed and change a baby that also to have real true interaction with them helping them to work on aspects of an infant's development with them right where they are.

So here's a breakdown of what I think an infant room should be:

  1. Anyone injured room should be to remove their shoes put on Fox or pre-prepared how shoot and immediately go wash their hands.
  2. What they want their hands and put on a smog then and only then can they enter the infant room and catch babies.
  3. If they themselves have cold or some other kind of respiratory infection they should cover their mouth with a mask
  4. Everyone who comes in contact with the infants need to work really hard to ensure that they are kept well. 
  5. Breastfeeding moms should have a quiet private place to nurse.
  6. Teachers should be seen either on the floor with infant or holding them in rocking chairs or playing with them in some kind of way talking with them engaging with them reading to them showing them black and white pictures and colorful objects.
  7. You should find a lesson plan on the wall somewhere it should have individual children's named and an activity or page number something to let you know that the teachers are doing some kind of educational activity with each child.
  8. The staff should remain static only if there are lunches a teacher is sick or there's some other kind of training teachers in the infant room should be there always and Romaine the child teacher until they leave that classroom.
  9. Only parent and infant teacher should be allowed in the infant room at all times.
  10. You should be able to ask any teacher in the room what is the procedure for emergency evacuation and they should be able to tell you.
  11. Bottle should be warmed in a bottle warmer a Crock-Pot with water or an electric kettle with the big tub nearby that allows hot water to be used to warm bottles, bottle should never be warmed in a microwave.
  12. The diaper changing area should be meat and clean there should be a water solution that is 1 part bleach 3 Parts water used to clean the infant changing station.
  13. Hot and cold running water with soap should be close enough for Teacher to watch their hands without removing the the baby after changing.
  14. Babies who are walking should not be in the same space with babies who are not.
  15. When babies are awake they should be either in a carrier on the floor with other baby, on the floor on their tummies playing with objects, in their cribs playing with your hands and feet, or with the teacher. You should see babies in all of these places when you visit. If you see baby's only and carriers for every time you did that that's a warning sign.
  16. If you see baby to have balding spots in the back of their heads, and it's more than one baby that cost or warning sign that they spend most of the day in their carriers are car seats or laying on their backs in their cribs.
  17. Our teacher talking to baby as they change them this is a good time from language and Faith to Faith activity and teachers should be using it for such.
  18. Every Center should share information with you on how your child is doing daily. One of the most special ways that I have seen is an infant care room that used journals and wrote down more than just what the child 8 or whether or not they made use of their diaper. The teacher also shared their impressions of the child what exercises they were working on what cute things were done and took pictures Polaroid and take them into the journal so that it not only became a way for parent to learn about your baby during the day it also became a keepsake. The really cool thing about this journal is that it went back and forth between parent and teacher so that each one of them had a chance every day to write in until both the center and the home had really good ideas includes about what was going on with the baby every day.
  19. There should be information about infant care in the room for you to pick up teacher should share with you and be able to answer your questions about infants on a regular basis they deal with infants everyday.
  20. The infant room should be a comb and happy place you should hear music in the background teacher should be pleasant with one another it should be happy place a place that you want to stay and linger with your baby while you're there.

So if I was with you looking for child care on infant room that I would say yes this is where your child should be these are the 20 things that I would look for and expect in a high-quality infant room.

Taking care of infant is exacting and exhausting work. Teachers who love it though never work a day in their lives they just love an opportunity to be around babies all day
You want to get the sense from being in that room that that's exactly how they feel and they are looking out for and doing the very best possible job for DMV in their care. Ultimately this makes the very best high quality program. Teachers who are well-educated and love babies I want to do everything they can to help them grow and develop.

Believe in Parenting
Want more information ptanda.org

Want more information about quality child  care? Check out the book Choosing High-Quality Child Care!

Wednesday, March 20, 2019

Co-parenting-Coming Together Like a Sperm and an Egg

One of the things I've always found very interesting is that we have adults who are not marreiedand share their child in different households, and that's called co-parenting. I find that to be ironic because the truth is everybody co-parents.

There is this myth that exist in Western culture that parenting is somehow an innate behavior. The truth is we learned to parent from how our parents parented us. We take the sum of our childhood experiences and repeat those experiences with our own children. Now, if your parents were wonderful. loving, kind, supportive, and understood who you were meant to be then that is awesome!Because, you're going to be that same kind of parrot. However if your parents were mean-spirited, cold, unresponsive, neglectful, and vengeful the chances are you are going to raise your children the same way. Tthere are cases where this is not the case; my own father is a Case in point. Just understand that there are always exceptions to the rule.

I will point out this is not a doomsday prediction, it is afgterall why parent coaches exist. Here are some things to remember.

  1.  Every adult has the power to change the way they act, think. and behave; it is a choice. 
  2. This process is difficult because as I said before parenting is a learned behavior which means you have to unlearn some things and relearn others. 
  3. A parent coach is oone professional who can help you beging to navagate the changes you may want to make. 
  4. This is also what makes co-parenting so valuable; because you are not parenting alone you have a partner This partner is a person who is in this with you who wants you to be the best parent you for the sake of your children.

So here's an exercise what emphasizes the most important parts of co-parenting. That is having a clear erstanding of the household your spouse grew up in. I encourage take a day or two and think about the following question and then come together and talk about it.

The best/worst thing about growing up in my house with my parents was...

 Here is how I recommend you go through the process.

  1. When you talk about it the atmosphere is really important. Talk in a quiet plaxce where you both feel safe and cozy. This is probably going to be one of the most intimate conversations you will have in your realtionship. 
  2. Be courteous and really listen, observe body language, and hear the emotions your spouse is feleting as they share about how they grew up. Is it something they want to repeat or is it something they want to change? Sometimes even the things that seemed good did not necessarily felt that way growing up.
  3.  Get really transparent with each other about how you grew up and what your household was really like and then give each other love, comfort, and understanding around those tough issues. Celebragte and laugh about the happy and joyous times.
  4. After sharing these thoughts and feelings give it a couple of weeks maybe even a month, but then come back together and talk about how you wamt tp raise your family together. 
Ask these questions
  1. What are some of the things that you really want to repeat and make a tradition in your own household?
  2.  What are some of the things that you absolutely do not want to repeat, and do not want in your family?
Create a Parenting Pact

  1.  Talk about these things 
  2. Write them down J
  3. old each other accountable 
  4. Make a plan to review this at least yearly 
Our views change becayse we read, gain more information through talk-shows, and onversations. Parenting at it's root is a relationship between parent and child. Children have different relationshps with each parent. This is neither good nor bad it just the way things are. Revising these things in an open and honest conversation keeps you on the same page and helps your children know what the boundares are because they get the same answer from each of you.

I will say it again everybody co-parents. The thing about it, is you could do it wisely by talking it through, offering each other support, and being on the same page. Or you could fight one another never seeing eye to eye on what it means to parent. I would pick the former it us for the best. Good luck!

Believe in Parenting

Want more information ptanda.org