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Tuesday, November 12, 2019

From generation to generation



For many years it has been my understanding that the Lord loves-- absolutely delight in Generations.  and psalm 33:11 he says this: 

The counsel of the Lord stands forever, The plans of His heart from generation to generation.

I would go so honored and privileged this past Shabbat on November 9th to see that play doubt before me it was the bat mitzvah of a young lady in our synagogue. During the course of the service she heard her younger sister and her older sisters, their mother and grandmother all sang a song about how God blesses the generations. The Rassmuessens's   brought tears streaming down my face to see how G-d's people are able to know God and then to pass that love from mother to daughter, from mother to daughters; it just blessed me. The reason God dent me to the planet is to help adults to do just what I witnessed on Saturday. It blessed me.


Since September I have been teaching about work-life balance in combination with authenticity and just how important it is to be true to what you believe. Parents are the example for our children As adults children live out 85S% of what they observe and do int their homes. Thus, I encourage parents to be the living example what it means to be people of faith. It was obvious to me that thaos was a principle of the Rasmussen family.  They were together singing praise to the Lprd of Abraham Isaac and Jacob for their generations.


It reminded me of how blessed I am. My grandfather took me to church when I was 10-12 years old just as he took my mother. My father's father was a minister. The generation of my grandparents passed their love of Gpd tp me and my sister. Sometimes I'm overwhelmed by thinking about from Adam and Eve Until the End of Time the generations that we will see. I often wonder if people in heaven will be wearing the clothes that were prevalent in their generation. I have concluded probably not, but it's still fun to think about. This brings me to the question and the purpose of my writing this blog.


You have a choice and your choice starts now. Because you do no have years to wait.


What kind of legacy do you want to pass on? Wha5t are you actively doining to pass it on today?


 The choice is yours you can be like the Rassmuessen"s you can pass your belief and your love of the God of Abraham Isaac and Jacob on to your children and their children and their children. It starts by deciding you're going to do so. You are going to read your Bible, you want to talk to your children about reading the Bible, you going to talk about God and what he expects of us, you are going to be the example for themm then will see you be the example for them teaching them to be the example for their children and --so on--so on. 


I believe that legacy has less to do with money and more than this. Becaise this the legacy that God expects us to leave. King Solomon said A good man leaves an inheritance for his children's children. Choose to leave an inheritance to your children and their children a legacy of faith. It is after a;; the most valuable inheritance you can leave them.

Believe in parenting

Sunday, October 27, 2019

Quality-time is a Myth!! Our Kids need Our Undivided Attention



Over the last week both the New York Post and Fox News reported that parents tend to spend more time with their phones than they do with their children which shows me the downward slope continues. I was alarmed by the findings a few years ago when Pew research noted that parent spend an average of 19 hours a week with their children and that included both discipline and general caring like bathing and feeding. Is it any wonder that the new Barna Research report that came out earlier this month shows that only 1/3 of young adults feel cared for by others?

The report says that Millineals and Generation Yers feel connected to the world on a global scale and are passionate bout what is happening out there. However, only 33% feel that someone they know personally cares about them and what is happening in their lives. This tells me that we as adults are failing to connect with our kids. When a whopping 66% feel disconnected in their lives I call that an epidemic. As a parent coach this has been my concern for many years as parents often talk about quality-time. Let me say this with as much honesty, straight forwardness and clarity as possible.

QUALITY TIME IS A MYTH THAT IS SENDING THE NEXT GENERATION INTO A SUICIDE RATE THAT IS THE SCARIEST IN HISTORY!

Our children are just plain lonely. It is so unfair to them. They tare not just accessories in our lives. They need real connection with their parents. Schools have become indoctrination centers where individual children are not important. Getting children into group think is.As a  person who is an expert in early childhood education I have seen what group think and grouping children together from an early age can do. We in our society are losing the value of the individual. It is time for parents and the church to get our heads of of the sand and begin acting in the best interest of our babies. The government not only can not do so they are not meant to!

So, what can be done?

  • Limit your use of screens There is more and more research showing that interacting with screens are addictive. The interaction with screens stimulate the pleasure center of the brain. Many adults, teens and children are becoming addicted and this leaves those around them without the human interaction they need.
  • Talk to your kids. As in have actual conversations with them right from birth and even before. Children especially those under the age of 5 need face to face interaction and communication. it is this communication that prepares them for literacy.Children need to hear 3 million + words to be ready to learn to read at age 5. This comes from conversations, cuddling to read books, bedtime stories etc.
  • Do things as a family that does not include screens. Have a picnic at a local park and play games like tag and hide and go seek. Go on a hike and take lots of pictures you can scrapbook later. Start a family reading night. Where you read much loved children novels like Charlotte's Web, or Where the Red Fern Grows. Find a local festival to attend and talk to your kids about what this festival is focused on and why it is important.
  • Make at least one night a week screen free night. Have everyone come in plug up and turn of their devices. Make dinner together. Sit down and talk about your day. Then either read your family book or play a boardgames.
  • Listen, Listen, Listen Give your child at minimum 15 minutes a day of your undivided attention. Listen to what they have to say. Nothing makes a child feel more loved, accepted, and connected to an adult who they can communicate with openly, honestly, and with loving care. This is probably the number one question I get from parents. How do I get my children to talk to me? My answer make time to give them your undivided attention and do not just hear them listen to them and understand what they at re saying and why they tare saying it.
These five things are not the whole answer. However, they are things you can start doing today that will begin to curb the loneliness issue that is prevalent in our children's lives. I guess what I am trying to say is we are the solution we are looking for to create a space where our children are getting their need met and it takes lots of time and attention. The real problem is that quality time robs our children of what they most need and that is us!

Believe in Parenting

Wednesday, September 11, 2019

Becoming a Psalms 78:6 Parent!




Psalm 78:6 The Message (MSG)


6 Then commanded our parents to teach it to their children So the next generation would know, and all the generations to come—Know the truth and tell the stories so their children can trust in God, Never forget the works of God  but keep his commands to the letter.


Every Christian parent  hopes they are are raising children who will chose to serve God, and also teach their children to do so. However, achieving this goal takes far more than hope. It takes a steady and determined thought and behavioral pattern. There are four steps as outlined in Deuteronomy 6:6-9 (NASB).


6 (I)These words, which I am commanding you today, shall be on your heart. 7 (J)You shall teach them diligently to your sons and shall talk of them when you sit in your house and when you walk by the way and when you lie down and when you rise up. 8 (K)You shall bind them as a sign on your hand and they shall be as frontals on your forehead.9 (L)You shall write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.


Be on your Heart


One of the important things about our faith is that we live what we say we believe. This is called acting justly. When we act justly our beliefs are just there. However, our relationship with the Lord is not simply what we do. It is about our daily interaction with Him. One mistake we make is to say that the Holy Scriptures is the word of God. The scripture only points to the Word of God. John 1:1 tells us that the word became flesh and dwelt among us Jesus (Yeshua) is the word of God. It is our relationship with Him that is  spoken of loudly in what say and do, in addition to the decisions we make. Most believers in the Messiah have no issue with this however we fail to follow the other mandates. Which leave our children in the dark. 


Teach them Diligently to your Children


Teaching is done in two ways first it is taught by observation. Children observe their parents; if our lives are speaking loudly of our relationship with the Word of God. Children are able to see and  copy what they observe. They do what we do. Children become better at being who we are than we do. The second way children learn is through discussion and parents asking open ended questions. Children need to think about their own values and their own relationship with the Word. So the question is are you diligently living out your relationship with G-d and are you constantly discussing and asking your children about what they think or believe. Do you ask you children what they think the scriptures mean?





Talk about the Statues


We are instructed to never cease talking about what G-d has to say, what, He means, and how we can live it out. Talking about how to live this life on a daily basis is an important part of what we are instructed by Deuteronomy to do on a daily basis. In modern vernacular when you get up, at the breakfast table, in the car, at work, at home, at our House of Worship, in the grocery store, etc. Please remember talking often takes place louder in how we act and react to a situation often speaks louder than what we say. Are you acting justly, loving  mercy, and walking humbly with G-d? Are you talking about what that means? How often do you talk about what is happening in your spiritual life? Do you talk to your spouse in front of your children? Do you invite your children to discuss what is happening in both your life and theirs? Do you study the scriptures as a family? How often do you discuss what the sermon was about at the service? Do you use that to lead family discussions on the issue? The goal is to talk about , pray and read together, and ask questions?


Signs and Reminders


This scripture tells us to bind things on our foreheads, tie reminders on our hands, and to put them on our doors and gates. In today’s world there are a variety of ways to do this. We have posters, paintings, t-shirts, plaques, throws, and a variety of other reminders we can place around our homes, offices, and automobiles. We all can have a variety reminders have you spoken to your children about why. My father was proud to be a Leo once he became saved and realized the error he was making and stopped collecting lions. Later, he realized Jesus was the Lion of the Tribe of Judah. He renewed his love of lions and our house became full of reminders which referred to Messiah as the Lion of the Tribe of Judah. I still have many of those reminders. They are reminders to me and will be reminders to my children they have a heritage of faith.

Ultimately, living the life of a Psalms 78:6 parent is about teaching your children how important it is not to just live a life pleasing to God. But, to pass it on to the next generation. Teaching our children to live out their faith in front of their children, and so on.

Why American Kids are Starving and Eating Three Meals a Day!






            
 I want every parent in America to stand up for their children. What we eat determines our quality of life. It is how our brain’s do or do not develop. Research is beginning to show that both Autism and ADHD are diet related. The kinds of high fat, high sugar food served in schools today are the exact foods that trigger the symptoms. Children and in fact all of us need foods that grow in the ground, on trees and not from factories.  Someone once said that “the love of money, is the root of all evil.” In the early 1900’s people sold plaster of paris as powdered milk. Now, in the early 21st century; it is selling food that feeds the stomach, but not the body.
            
The very people who want to “educate” our children are poisoning them with the breakfasts and lunches they give them 180 days a year.  That is 360 meals a year to be exact. This means that your children are eating foods that keep them from being hungry, but do not feed their muscles, their brains, or their hearts. But, instead bring ill health and sluggishness to their bodies and minds. I believe that until parents get involved and demand that healthy, well-balanced, and less processed food are provided for school lunches. The prediction of the World Health Organization will prove true. Our children will live a shorter, sicker, lower quality of life than their parents and grandparents before them.
             
  There are six foods to remember our children need to feed their bodies and there brains. They should start on these foods as soon as they are off formula and ready to eat good foods. They can be remembered with a great acronym GBOMBS.

G- Greens B- Beans O-Onions M-Mushrooms B-Berries S-Seeds


These are the basis for a plant-rich, nutrient dense, body and brain feeding diet. Jamie Oliver, Nathaniel Jordan, Dr. Oz, Dr. Mike Moreno and many others are standing up and talking about the standard American Diet *SAD* and the damage it is doing to ourselves and our kids. Get them ona GBOMBS diet and keep them on it. Teach your kids to feed their bodies and their minds with real food!


Believe in Parenting

Tuesday, August 13, 2019

To Parents of NICU Babies: My Story



Many people believe that when a child is born and needs time the
neonatal unit they are destined to have a hard life. I can tell you
some of that very true but, some of it isn't. When I was born on
October 11th 1965 I would literally more than 6 weeks early. My
mother's due date was December 18th. I was born at 9 a.m. in the
morning I weighed in at 2 lb 5 and 1/2 oz and a nurse gave me
mouth-to-mouth resuscitation for 2 and 1/2 hours before I breathed
on my own. The doctor came to my mother's room at 11 am to consle
her on my loss. He thought I was stillborn. He had no idea the n
urse had work so hard to save my life. He warned my mother that I
would probably be sickly and die at an early age.At that time as
an infant my mother couldn't breastfeed me for various reeasons
so my diet consisted of boiled and pulverized white rice, mashed
bananas, and weak tea. I would prone to seizures and also just
very sickly as a child.I was put on phenobarbital at that time
to prevent seizures and while there's not a whole lot to be
said the seizures I had as a child I can tell you that two
things resulted from being on phenobarbital. The first is the
medicine kept me awake. My parents would drive me around at
night playing classical music to get me to go to sleep. That's
I've been trained to fall asleep at classical music. I took my
Mom to see The Nutcracker; for her 70 birthday.My whole life
I've wanted to see the Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy live and
I fell asleep. Ironically, the second issue also has to do is
sleep. Wen they took me off the phenobarbitol at age 5 my
mother said I slept for three days.


It is believed that most children who end up in the NICU
will end up falling somewhere on the of autistuc soectrum.
I learned that at a conference a few years ago. Since then I
have recognized that thus us true or me as Id sometimes
don't pick up on social cues. However, that hasn't
kept me from being very successful at the coach and the
teacher. Nor has it kept me from helping 10000 + parents
develop a stronger and more powerful parenting relationships
with their kids.


The lesson I'd like you to take from this is that even if
your children start out in the neonatal unit nobody can say
where they will end up. The key is to recognize that your
children may have some limitations. However, it does not mean
you should not have abd hold them to high expectations.
When parents believe in their children and place high
standards on what they can and should be able to achieve
within what ever limitations exist children work to get to
the highest level they possibly can. It is empowering for
children they believe in themselves because you believe
in them.


I promise you there will be many well-meaning professionals
in your life who will tell you that your child is going to
be limited in some way. But, I can tell you that in my case
the medical professionals were wrong. My mother believed
in me. She pushed me; held me to high expectations and
while I didn't always meet them. It was never because she
didn't believe in me. It is because of this belief; that I
firmly believe that it is my job to affect my generation to
be the absolute best parents they can be.


So, I want to encourage you. Pray tp the only person who
really knows why your child is capable of and what they've
been sent to the planet to do God himself. If you ask Him
to show you how to guide your child so that they can hit
the target that He has set for them and their lives. So you
understand the purpose, and the reason he sent them Earth
He will. More than likely a little bit every day you will see
something new and different and almost miraculous in your
baby, your child, the teen they become,and the adult
prepared to do the plan for which He sent them.

God gave you this particular child because He trust you to
struve through whatever difficulties or trials they may
have. So in the ehd they can to hit the ground running and
taking off to work int their generation and making a
difference in the world. You can do this! You have everything
in you to do this even if it feels like you don't!
It's there reach down deep pull it up and get on with it.
My parents did it in 1965 without all the help and
support parents have today to raise premature children.
You have help. you have a do you have support, There
are parent groups all over the world. You can start
by looking at this website Parent2ParentGA . If you
feel aneed to talk to me make no hesitation to reach
out to me my email address and educatepta@gmail.com.
I believe in you and I want you to do everything you
can to be the best mom and dad you can be.

Believe in parenting

Tuesday, August 6, 2019

Conversation, Reading, and Education



Over the years many parents have asked me what is the key to my child being succeesful in school. I have given a variety of answers, however new research has changed my thoughts on this topic. The new research says:


  1. Children need to hear 3 million words before they enter Kindergarden in order to be ready to read. (The words during screentime do not count, it is in person to person communication.)
  2. Children need healthy social/emotional development to be able to properly engage in the classroom.
  3. Children who can recognize and write thier name before they go to Kindergarten are ready to read.
  4. Children need to read 8 million words from First Gradethrogh eighth grade inorder to do well and be ready to engage in the high school classroom.
  5. Children need to engage in activities where they use math and math conacepts on a regular basis. The easiest ones at home is cooking, woodworking, and games like sudko.
  6. Playing games like Junior srabble, Scrabble, Upwords, and crossword/word search .
  7. The more children have discussions with others the better their ability to engage with language in real time conversations at school. 
  8. Spending time as a family engaging in games, activities, and using teachable moment regarding lanugage and math, gets kids to practice almost without thinking about school. It gives them a better undersatanding of how school is really preparing them to live in the world.
Each of these eight areas can be a blog all on its own. So, over the next few weeks I will be taking each topic and creating a more expansive post for each. Let me just say this. There are two things you can do for your children to improve thier schooling. Read in front of them, read to them, and make them read at least one book a week, or a month if it is a chapter book. Chapter books you can actually read as a family; discuss what is happening in the story and talk about thoughts and feelings regarding the story. Which leads to my other thought talk to your kids, have conversations with them on a regular basis. Make it about interesting things that you like and share together.

  1. Sports
  2. Cooking
  3. Hobbies
  4. Cars
  5. Fashion
  6. Current Events
  7. Vacations
  8. Outings
  9. Family Fun time or Issues
  10. What you and they dream of having in your lives.
I guess you can see a theme throughout this blog reading and coversations are fundamental to supporting your kids education. It is a simple and as difficult as that.

Believe in Parenting


Wednesday, July 31, 2019

Be a Living Example--Follow Your Dreams!


Parenting it’s so important to our God who is the Lord of Hosts and it is Jis desire is that we as parents raise our kids to love, honor, obey,  and commit to Him and  the reason why He sent them to the planet This is a big responsibility and you can't do it on your own. I takes a community to do this. but not just any community, it takes a community of believers. Believers who are in prayer listening to and tobeying the Holy Spirit. for what He’s telling you about  each child's life experiences, who they need their friends to be, where should they go to school, what should their extracurricul aractivities should be, ut and  how do you help them to target themselves so that they positivelyshift their life into the plan and purposes God has for them. The number one way parents do this for their kids is to first do it for themselves.

This is the primary reason why I say that it’s important to watch your actions; because your kids are watching! If you spend your time working a job that you hate, one that you had to to put food on the table and a roof over your head. Then you come home and talk badly about your boss and about how much you hate your job, that is not the kind of example that you want to set for your children; about following God’s purpose for their lives. Instead consider what would happenm if you got before God and found out what your purpose is and pursue it.Going after it with your whole heart because that is what God wants for you, your child  would see that example. The only way for them to sii it  is if you choose to do it yourself. Find some other parents who are or want to live this way just two or three and become accountability partners. A friend,  your spouse, your, parents and other people in your lives who will undoubtedly and wholeheartedly support you to follow your dreams. So here are five things I suggest you do.


  1. Get a journal and write about all the things you thought about doing.  It can all the stuff that you love to do. Just think about it and write about it, ask your parents about it, ask siblings about it, otake 10-14 days to do this.
  2. Take the Mulyiple  intelligence Unventory. The multiple intelligence inventory is going to help you to figure out what is your primary secondary and tertiary form of btsom engagement which will help you figure out what you love to do and if you compare what you love and any careers that fall into that territory you then have a place to start. Once you have developed an  understanding about your brain engagement and how you can use it to direct your own path. Then you gain  a little bit of understanding about. what your kids  love and how they can begin to think aout their future in that way. Now, the Lord can begin to open your eyes your understanding of where you fit where He’s plugged you in why don’t you do those things and plug in and begin to go after the dreams the left of your kids will change because you are now being the example they need. By doing this you are giving them permission to go after their own dreams, in their own lives.
  3. I suggest your read a book by Dr. Caroline Leaf called; Switch On Your Brain. This book will help you to work at changing your mind set and give you the tools you need to make a difference in how you live your life.
There is one thing you must remember above all things. If you want your children to live their best lives it starts with you setting the example by living your best life first!

I hope this helps believe in your parenting all the more.

Believe in Parenting

Want more? ptanda.org

Sunday, July 28, 2019

Going Back to School--Allergies



Here in Georgia Thursday is the first day of school for many children.Going back to school is often nerve wracking for kids and makes young kids heyper and a littler distracted. This is why it is important for parents to give the adults at the school good information about your child's allergies. KIds who have allergies, asthma, and especially food allergies need the adult responsible for their care to have all the infomation needed to care for them properly. As always I suggest you visit the school a day or two before school starts especially if your child is starting Kindergarten. This will give them a familiarity with the school. This is the time to take your child's food and other allergic information to the school nurse, cafetreria ladies, the office and your child's teaceher. Include a photo of your child with the information. So, here are the thingts Dr. Erin Gardner of Atlanta Allergy recommended on the Atlanta Checkup Radio Program Sunday July 28, 2019. If you do not have an allergy doctor for your child check out Atlanta Allergy and Asthma.


  1. Schedule an paoointment with your allergist and talk about retesting and creating a school plan to share with school personnel.
  2. Get refills and updates on medication. Take meds to school and find out school policy on whre the medicine is kept and who admisters the meds if the nurse is not in the shool daily. Ifr your school has a health clinic check in with them and discuss your child;s allergy. 
  3. If your child has a food allergy; create a food allergy plan with your chil;s doctor and be sure all relevant personnel have a copy. (Teacher, Nurse, Cafeteria Head, and Ofrfice.)


As an educational advocate I suugest you check in with the teacher at least monthly and ask questionms about what you are noticing your child having issues with in homework ask for suggestson you can help with at home. Review the allergy information with them and always find something positive to say to the teacher about their work with your child. You are the only one who has known you child since birht you know their stregnths and weaknesses. Be prepared to help the teacher who is in this most likely because she loves children. You can make her life easier by thinking through solutions rather than looking for issues. This person is an ally in getting your child to succeed treat themlike ome.

Believe in Parenting

Wednesday, July 17, 2019

Effective Parenting: Focus on the End not the Beginning




I call parenting the toughest job you wll ever love and hate! This is the most uniqye job in the world because it asks you to help someone who is new to the world or someone who has benn bruised and battered by the world and give to them everything they will need to grow into an authentic and productive menber of the city, country, and global world to which we all belong. It feel daughning and it is exacting. But, this person is cute, loving, kind, funny, sometimes angry , scared, scarred, and overwhelmingly vulnerable. So, how do you do this job with love, support, discipline and even sterness, expectations, and support all at once?


Start with You

Over the years I have learned that being a great parent begins with knowing yourself, what you believe, what is important to you and why it is important. This is the foundation of authenticity. This is the number one thing that adults need to parent effectively. Why? The answer to this question lies in the fact that children especially ypung childen are keen observers. They spend endless hours observing the world around them, looking at what parents say and do consistently. As an early childhood teacher, I would tell parents I knew what was going on in their home by watching their children.



Once when I was observing in the three year old class room a little girl named Lin was in the hous keeping area. She put on a fether boa, a larg floppy hat and high heel she told her friend she would be back. She went to the art area and drew a picture, she went and got her snack, she asked the teacher a quetion, and then headed back to the housekeeping area and yelled; "Honey, I'm home". I have to tell you to this day it is the cutest thing I have everseen aloth that young lady is now probably 25. When her mom came to get her later that day I just had to ask. When you go out and come home do you usually say, "honey, I'm home?" she looked a bit startled and said yes, then I told her the story. She laughed and said they will give you away won't they, I smiled and nooded.




Later, when I was a center director at a military installation. I had a four year old David who everytime he made a mistake a certain four letter word would come out of his mouth. When I called Dad into my office to discuss he issue, he turned beet red, told me his wife warned him about his mouth, and  said he would talk to him. Several weeks later I was giving the classroom teacher a break when David made a mistake on his coloring page. Ge said, the four letter word and then said "oh I mean fiddle sticks". Then looked at me I smiled at him and winked.

The point I am illustrating with these stories is that your children will mirror who you are. The will highlight to you both the things you love and hate about who you are; so by working on yourself first you are changing that model for your children. One thing most people do not know about kids is that they will take a full 80% of what they see from their parents into their adulthood and only 20% of what they hear. This means your actions carry a heavier weight in your parenting than what you say. Thus, the saying actions speak louder than words is key to the process of effective parenting.

Adults not Children

It is difficult for most new parents to look at their child and realize in just a few short years they will be groown and off to college. When you have this little bundle of joy it is hard to remember the bulk of your relationship with then wil be as adult to adult. I realized earlier this week that the great anxiety we all had over the issue of Y2K was twenty years ago. Time really does fly. If you had a child in 1999 tget wukk tyrb 20 this year that is how fast time flies. Babies born during the time of 9-11 turn 18 this year.What I am saying is many times we worry about our kids and what is happening in their lives today. But, the best thing for us to do is to be concerned primarily with who they will be as they leave your home to begin creating homes of their own.

I think this is extreamely important because it will take the pressure off you wanting your child to be perfect. No one is perfet. All we can expect is for our children to do their best. If what we do is help them to think before they act. Get them to know the rules and understand how those rules apply to thhem.  Then teach them to use the rules to govern their behavior, attitudes, and how they relate to others. Then hold them accountable according to their age and understanding, only then can we begin to expect them to create the person they will grow into as an adult. Until then they are going to make the same mistakes we did and many times still do. Give your kids room to be human.

Parenting with the Future in Mind

The ultimate goal of parenting is to send your child into the world ready to take it on and win. This means preping them to be successful. There are five things to focus on here.


  1. Be a great example.
  2. Be authentic. While teaching them to be authentic.
  3. Live your own dreams, Hopes, and goals.
  4. Help them to explore who they are ant ehir own hope and dreams.
  5. Focus on helping them to live up to who they are meant to be and not who you want them to be


One of the reasons this is the toughest job you will ever love and hate boils down to one of my favorite sayings: "Your children are not yours, they are on loan from God". What I take this to mean is God sent your kids here wit ha purpose and that purpose is to serve Him. They serve Him by doing what He has sent them here to do. If you make that your focus; them you will become one of the most effective parents on the planet.

Believe in Parenting

Thursday, May 30, 2019

Train Them Up; PT&A's New Project--A Brand Story




When I was 22 years old  I sought God for my purpose. Meeting Dr. Myles Monroe in the lobby of Metropolitan Christian Worship Center and having him tell me. “Connect with God the manufacture and find out why He sent you here to Earth and you will never founder.” It changed my life. I have always worked with children it started in the church nursery when I was 13. So, after graduating from college and working at Kiwanis Camp Wyman where I learned first-hand the devastation f children who were wards of the state. I met two little girls ages 10 and 12 whose mothers put them into care rather than give up the boyfriends who were molesting their daughters. It was the first time I met with children who were not in connected relationships with their parents.  It broke my heart and sent me to God not just to find why, but how I could become the solution. This started me on the journey to understanding how broken adults in turn break their kids. It was a few years late that I realized 100% of adults are broken and need help to heal so they can effectively connect with their children
In 1995 I graduated from Oral Roberts University with a master’s degree in early childhood education with an emphasis in parenting. It was ll years later when I along with three friends formulated Parents, Teachers, and Advocates a parent development group whose mission is to coach adults to inspire, motivate and empower their children to become exceptional adults. Since then we have worked with over 10,000 adults in conjunction with nonprofits, churches, childcare centers and others coaching parents to overcome their brokenness and begin to build stronger relationships with their children.
Train Them Up is our new project. This show is designed to create a safe place where adults can be authentic sharing joys, hurts, frustrations, and anger with God, each other, and experts. It is the goal that through this authenticity we will develop strong connections with ourselves, God, our community, and our children. Allowing us to use the authenticity and connectedness to become more effective parents. I often say parenting is the toughest job you will ever love and hate. Train Them Up is a talk show dedicated to coaching parents into Authentic, Connected, and Effective parenting from pre-birth through college graduation. Come and join our community watch the show, join our FB page, join our 30, 60, and 90-day challenges, attend our conferences, and travel with us on our cruises. You can be an effective parent you just need authenticity and connection to bring your child from birth through college graduation.

Believe in Parenting

Want more information ptanda.org 

Book by Barb Harvey--
Work-Life Balance 
Multiple Intelligence: Building You and Your Team Choosing High-quality Child Care


Wednesday, May 15, 2019

Are You Ready for the Summer?



Here in Georgia we have two weeks of school left and parents are working on plans for their children going into Summer. Some kids will go see family for the Summer holiday. Some kids will go off to a long camping session. Some will sit at home and play, games, watch TV, and just crash. Still others will spend half the tinme in Summer School and then move on to other activities. Summer is not like it was for me when I was off in the late 70's and early 80's where I left home on my bike came home for lunch, left and did not get back until dinner. I then was gone again until dark. "Be hme before the street lights come on" was the the rule in our house. Now, kids do not have that much freedom so it falls to parents to help kids create great Summer vacays.

So here's where I suggest you start. Have you children take a multiple intelligence inventory there is a wonderful one by Scholastic here is the link to it. (By the way Scholastic has some great learning tools, I suggest you go online and do a parent registration!) Multiple intelligence is the use of what causes the brain to rev up and become activated in a way that exudes positive energy and allows people to thrive. I like to call it brain sparking.

I firmly believe that understanding your multiple intelligence allowed you to find out not only what you're good at doing and what excites your learning and life enjoyment. Having your children participate in activities, camps, and programs that allow them to feel the power of their brain at full engaement not only makes them happy.  It  gives them the tools needed to make their brains work better, faster, and more efficiently.

This Summer it is possible to give your children a lifelong gift. The gift of knowing what causes their brain to engage on all cylinders and thus enable them to think more clearly in both school and life. Understanding thier multiple intelligence is something they can carry forward into their future and be all the better for it.

Here are my thoughts for great ideas for multiple intelligences activities.


Logical/Mathematical-Space /Robotics/Coding 
Linguistic-Blogger/Spoken Word/Magazine Creation
Spacil-Photography/Moviemaking/Sculpture
Musical Band/Composition-music/Songwriting-lyrics
Bodily/Kinthestetic Soccer/Gynastiscs/Swimming
Nature-Gardening/Meterology/Conservation
Interpersonal Cooperative porjects/Lego Bulding/Debate
Intrapaersonal Knitting/Cooking/Crochet
Existejtial Problem-Solving/Mystery/Religion


Believe in Parenting

Want more information on Parenting? ptanda.org

Want more information on Multiple Intelligences check out my paper on it here: Multiple Intelligences: Build You and Your Team




Tuesday, May 14, 2019

Same Stage, Different Age!





In childhood there are two stages that are similar yet different in the way they need to be handled. The ages are those of two year olds and those of teenagers.  These two ages have very different abilities in self-care, yet share a common goal: Independence.

I can do it myself.  Many parents will remember this statement coming from the two year old who wanted to put on their own shoes. During the teen years it shows up by wanting to do more adult like behaviors.  It is important to recognize that wanting to do something versus being at a developmentally appropriate level to do it are two different things.  Teens especially young teens need to earn the privilege to do more adult-like activities. A child who can not take out the trash and clean-u up their room without nagging is not ready to spend unsupervised time with their friends.

Supervision, Supervision Parental supervision is the most important job when discussing a two year old, quiet in the house means trouble.  Most parents think that teens need less supervision. They need more. Teens are looking into the adult world with all the curiosity of a two year old.  They are looking into drinking, driving, smoking, sex, and other adult activities. These children are not more able to accept this responsibility that the two year old is ready to tie their own shoes. Parents do need to know who their teen’s friends are, who their parents are, where they are going and what they are doing.

Undivided Attention Children at both stages need time with their parents. Two year olds need this time to be held, read to, and reassured. Teens need this time to be mentored, comforted, and supported.  Parents who practice active listening really ensure teens have what they need. Active listening requires listening and not judging. Asking your teen,”Are you seeking advice or do you just need me to listen?” This question sets the stage for how you will listen. Teens also sometimes talk more in the midst of an activity. Go for cooking dinner, playing a board or card game, hiking, or walking.

Although, the age changes the temperament and personality do not change. Keep this in mind as you spend time with your teens. Treat them accordingly and you and your teen will come through the teen years with flying colors.


Believe in Parenting

Want more information? ptanda.org