Master Parenting Part 4: The Will

The will is the road we travel as our emotions and mind meet. It is where choices are made. Often these decisions are made on a subconscious level.

Psychology tells us we all have a ever running dialog based on our experiences and what we have been taught as children. This ever running tape is called self-talk. It is the foundation of how we think and feel therefore it often controls the  decisions we make. I first learned about and dealt with my own self-talk in Dr. Phil Mc Graw's book Self Matters.

In this book Dr. Phil helps readers recognize their own self talk and make adjustments. Adults can often make decisions in a mistaken belief they picked up in childhood. For instance in my blog on Domestic Violence I spoke of a child learning to be either the abused or the abuser. Neither one of these is true yet the cycle of violence often perpetuate generation after generation based almost entirely on self talk and the kinds of relationships which people choose to have in their adult lives.

The only way to adjust self talk is to first recognize it as it is happening and then say out loud what you want to replace it with now. I recommend Dr. Phil's book and workbook if you would like to further your understanding of the topic. Because self talk is the foundation of our decision making recognizing what it is becomes paramount.

Our choices in parenting are also based on emotions, thinking, and self talk. This means being a master parent takes our stepping back and taking a good look at all of the above before making a decision about what our children may and may not do.

It also is very important to live in front of and talk to our children with great care and concern because we are formung their selt talk as well. Children believe what their parents tell them it becomes the foundation of how they make decisions in life. So, be honest , be kind, and be thoughtful about what you say and do. Master Parenting takes recognizing the decisions we make can and will effect our children in both good and negative ways. Choose Carefully!

Believe in Parenting